How not to toast marshmallows

Me and Dan discovered last night how not to toast marshmellows. If you want to not toast marshmellows and you have three hours to spare follow these simple instructions:


1) Pick a really windy night.
2) Buy some marshmallows and a lighter and cocktail sticks, they are the best kind for not toasting marshmallows, don't get skewers that might work!
3) Borrow a topless car and have the roof down even though its windy and night time, and drive to a beach.
4) collect some dampish wood
5) dig a whole in the sand so you get down to the silghtly damp bit
6) build the fire from balls of screwed up paper (the shiny not that flamable kind) and the damp wood.
7) spend about half a hour attempting to light the paper
8) get really excited when its finaly lit but a bit disaponted when you realises the wood will never catch fire.
9) get alot of smoke in you eyes and mouth.
10) give up trying to light the wood and have a paper only fire.
11) in the ten seconds of fire, quickly get out the marshmallows and put them on the cocktail sticks and hold them to the fire.
12) enjoy a slightly warm marshmellow and a slightly burnt hand.

P.S in connection with my last post, my mum emailed be another argument for skinny jeans, which is they use less fabric and therefore are more enviromentally friendly/ energy efficiant. However if this is true how come those tree hugging hippy types always wear flares?! someone should tell them.