how not to tell off teanagers

1) Don't accidently quote Micheal Jackson songs.

2) Don't Laugh.

3)If you have done the two above things don't go back to being serrious again, there's just no point.

These are the invauble lessons that arn't being taught to me in my 'children and young people in society MA'

We were singing 'Man in the Mirror' the one that starts :
I'm gonna make a change,
for once in my life,
It's gonna feel real good gonna make a difference
gonna make it ri---ght.

So I took her outside to tell her off for messing around and then for some reason I acidently used the phrase: so are you going to make a change?

and then I thought - 'those are the lyrics from the song how embarrasing' but instead of prending I didn't realise, which with hindsite would have been the sensible thing to do, I thought 'I'll just pretend I did it on purpose and carry on'

So I atually said: So are you gonna make a change...for once in your life? thankfully I did stop there and didn't continue with 'it's gonna feel real good, gonna make a difference ect.

but I did burst out laughing and so did she, and then I tried to go back to being a serious teacher again by saying 'go back in' in my scaryist teacher voice.

book tokens are silly

Dear anyone who still buy me christmas presents, thanks for your support dispite my lack of thank you letters.

On a totally unrelated matter, book tokens are silly...When I was younger I thought that book tokens would cost less than money e.g a £10 book token would cost about £9, or else why would anyone swop a tenner which is like a voucher that can be used anywhere or saved for a voucher that has limitations? The one good thing about book tokens is exitement that comes when you've used your creativity to swop your token for something other than a book, I think may be world chapion in most amount of non-books bought with a book token. My proudest achivement was getting a subway sandwidge out of my dyslexic budget, by buying books worth £40 for people and them getting me lunch in return.

firber-glass penguins

This weekend I went to visit my penguin. My penguin is almost as big as me and made from fibre-glass. It is hollow which means you can get inside it and although it really smells you can scare people quite a lot by making slight movements.

I've been commisioned to paint this peguin which will form part of a city wide display of giant penguins, that's coming out at christmas. Weird I know, but it's atually a good money making sceam, they've done it before with superlambananas (which is a scupture made of half a lamb and half a banana.) businesses pay a lot to sponcer a pengin, a lot of people come to liverpool to visit the penguins which generates money for liverpool, and artists get paid well and then at the end they aution off the penguins and make a lot of money for charity, so everyone is happy. So the penguin thing is basically an idea someone had to drag out the superlambanana thing which made everyone rich, But the cover story is that the penguins highlighting the issue of climate change.

So I went to the penguin factory at the weekend which is at liverpool inovation park. I spent a good 15 minuits wondering around an empty car park before I found some primative forms of life in the security hut. That was a bit harsh, their ok but they kept call petal and pumkin and other ridiculus names that only a grandmother should say. I then eventually found the door to the penguin rooms and walked through 3 rooms filled with hundreds of white penguins staring at me in a creapy way before I eventually forund some real life people.