Sunday 11 December 2016

Pregnant and Homeless

This week I went for a little break from my slightly stressful normal life, to see my parents for a bit. My sister's reaction was "wow -it must be bad if THAT'S your solution"

While I was there my parents mentioned that they were struggling to write the Christmas letter this year. (If you're unaware of Christmas letters it's a middle class dying art of boasting about your family) i.e. "This year Claudia achieved 13 a* at G.C.S.E and grade 8 bassoon, she continues to volunteer as snowy owl for the brownies." Growing up, the Christmas letters we're not only a chance for my parents to boast in our achievements but also a chance to show off their technology.

"we have a photocopier!"
"look at our christmas clip art"
"we have a colour printer now"
"we have a family email address!"

Now that even old people have Facebook there is really no need for a year's worth of boasts in one letter, because Facebook has many instant boast features. My parents said they might just do a letter with photos on this year, and I wondered if they had tried to write it and it came out like this:

Sarah (22) is set to graduate from Southampton Uni with a first.
Joanne (27) began the year volunteering her medical skills in Papua New Guinea with husband Elisha. They then moved to Leeds and bought their first home together.
Hannah (30) managed to become pregnant and homeless this year.

Merry christmas.
Love Jerry and Sue.

Yeah its a bit awkward.

It's not been a great year for us. If you've no idea what happened, here's a summary of what happened before we ended up in the Langston's homeless shelter. Becoming Second Homeless and this one is about The Langson's Homeless Shelter

Since then we found a new house that we were really excited about, had an offer accepted and if the survey had gone well we would have been in just before Christmas. I don't feel like going into detail but lets just say it didn't go well, we won't be in before Christmas and we might not get in that house at all.

And all this while I am being a house. I hope that by the time I evict my tenant I will have a house.


This tweet sums up our year.

On the bright side, from an evolutionary point of view I've achieved all I need to achieve as a species. Me and Dan are two people who have now almost reproduced 2 people. Maybe my parents could put that on their Christmas letter.

Our christmas decorations