Beating Cancer and The Frog

Since my relatively quick and painless battle with cancer I have been pursuing being a real comedian. I have defined this, for now as "bothering to do to a gig when I might not know anyone and bothering to travel outside of Liverpool". 2 weeks in and I've done 4 gigs and it's going pretty well.

I'm in the weird position of having done comedy for years (about 6) but really sporadically and only to the audience of people who go to Mello Mello, and then later on people I've met though The Legion of Doom's monthly gig at Mello Mello. In 2016 I then did an hour long show about my school days called "best days of your life" which I loved and so the next year I wanted to do another, but Eric was only a few months old and still very reliant on my boobs for nourishment, so I had to wait another year. And I'm glad I did't it would have been way to stressful to do it with a tiny baby.

In the run up to that show "Job Done" which was all about parenting, I thought I'd get some performing experience in a few places and that's when I started thinking maybe I should do this FOR REAL. It was a deliberate decision to just do it for a fun hobby before, which felt right at the time. But then I had this feeling of 'what if I could become actually good?' Not saying I'm terrible, but I haven't put the hours in that you need to be the best. It was that or having a third child, and I think this is easier to get out of if you think you've made the wrong decision than a third child. I could do this for a year and then decide to have a 3rd child but you can't have a 3rd child for a year and then decide being a parent of 3 is not really for me.

So in that time when I was ill in bed recovering from having my lymph nodes removed, I booked in a load of gigs and the last 2 weeks has been the start of that. I normally would perform every few months, and 50% of the stuff I did was new. Now I'm trying to do the same 5-7 minute bit anywhere that will have me to improve it. this is how its gone so far:

12th Nov Hot water comedy club Liverpool: Pretty good, lovely audience, slightly stumbled over a tiny bit.

16th Nov charity gig Blackburne house Liverpool: terrible! I went on first and the audience were not warmed up the best they could manage was a tiny titter. I'm not sure what I could have done differently.

18th Nov Comedy Store Manchester: so lovely, they have a dressing room with a leopard skin couch and mirrors with lights round them: I felt like a celebrity.

I was super nervous, this club is a big deal but I felt so good when it was done. See the video here.

19th Nov Frog and Bucket Manchester. if you're not familiar, every Monday night the Frog and Bucket runs a "beat the frog" competition. 3 members of the audience get cards and if all 3 hold them up you have to stop. If they don't then happy music comes on after 5 minutes and you've beaten the frog. Then you go through to a clap off- a pretty unfair way of deciding a winner, but I can't think of a better one.

It was a stressful drive there with my 8 year old sat nav that can't cope with any roads build since 2010. Luckily I'd brought my friend Rachel and she navigated me there. I arrived and was slightly disappointed that the acts just sat with the commoners: where's my mirror with the lights?! The set went so well, the audience were so lovely that I instantly relaxed and ad-libbed a bit. I can't believe I was actually saying the same stuff and on the night where the audience were silent. I came joint first with a guy called Micky Mckay. Maybe if I hadn't have asked my one friend to take a photo of me when she could have been clapping in the clap off I would have won. My prize is to spend more money on petrol and parking to come back in January and do 8 minutes uninterrupted. I'm looking forward to it really.

But more exciting than all of that I have (after much faffing with venues) booked in my own monthly comedy night! The "early risers comedy club" is aimed at parents or anyone who would appreciate a comedy night with a strict end time of 9:45. It's at Blackburne house on Hope street, every second Wednesday starting in January! Please like the Facebook page and invite others especially if you're in Liverpool.

Next gig is Hot water Liverpool 27th November, it's free but you have to book.

Thanks for reading, I promise my next blog will be a bit less up myself.

Bye Bye Cancer

It's 3 weeks since my operation and on Wednesday I went for my check up at the hospital. They had the results back from the bits of me they took out. They found: NO CANCER WHOOP WHOOP.
I was so happy and a bit emotional, I really do like being alive, and I really would be gutted if I had to have more operations and radiotherapy and all the stuff.

It does mean that this whole operation was completely pointless though, and I do miss my pelvic lymph node a bit. They're not completely pointless like the appendix. They help blood flow round the body and living without them means I have to do exercises to help the blood flow and I'm at risk of getting lymphedema or elephant leg as I like to call it. I made the mistake of googling it.

Eww. This is not even the worst picture there's way more disgusting ones.

I enjoyed a bit of time off, I had a week in bed and then 2 weeks where I had a couple of hours off each day. I didn't get through as much Netflix as I thought. I'm quite a doer so rest is difficult for me. In my rest time I also managed to book in several comedy gigs and start organising my monthly comedy night aimed at parents, did my tax return, made a bus birthday cake and party bags, and did some painting of the house. I did have some good naps too.

The Jelly king celebrating turning 4

We made 2 trips to Wilkos, 1 to B&Q and 1 to Taskers, before choosing the yellow on the bottom left which is actually a mixture of two paints.

This is for the new guest room now that Sarah has moved out

Everyone has been super amazing, one person paid for me to have a cleaner and the cleaner bought me chocolates! So many people bought me meals and I even had someone offer to stop well meaning people from bringing me food if it was needed. One person managed to get 4 car seats in their car to take percy and 3 under 2s out, and virtually everyone I know has texted me to ask how I was doing or prayed for me. My parents have been helping out on Mondays and Friday's even learning how to dance "the beam bag parade" in Percy and Eric's music and movement group. Dan as always has been super hardworking and been up early every day with the kids and taken over full control of the clothes wash and took Percy and friends out to mattel play for his birthday. Thank you! You are all heroes.

I was on a bit of a high driving back from the hospital (metaphorically) and then I passed a cyclist that had just collided with a non moving car. He just cycled straight into a back windscreen and smashed it. The car driver was already on the phone to the ambulance but I thought as I had just escaped cancer I should go and see if I could help. There was a lot of blood but the cyclist was conscious and sort of ok. I stayed and chatted with him for a while and gave him my kitkat and a bike lock I had so that he could lock up his bike and collect it later. In the car was two women and a baby who were all fine, but the baby did need a nappy change and luckily I had a nappy and wipes in the can too. I told the guy "that's your halloween costume sorted" it was probably too soon for that joke.

Percy's train picture we made into a pumpkin.

I don't know if Stage 1 cancer is bad enough to have a completely new perspective on life, you know those people who survive something massive and then go on to start a charity or climb everest. Yeah I didn't have bad enough cancer for that kind of thing, but I guess I am really grateful for the wonderful friends and family I have and we've almost booked a holiday for easter time. Driving in a Campervan from Nice to Barcelona. I cant wait.