How not to ask out women

• Obtain their number by imoral possibly illegal ways.
• Don't obtain basic facts like what they look like, what age they are or whether they are single.
• Ask them out by text.

People who work in builders merchants are seriously woman deprived! I discovered this a while ago after I occasionally went to this one to get breeze blocks for sculpture. Here is one I made called Frank:

You can read about him and his adventures here.

So that is the reason that I sometimes go to a builders merchants. I have a big project coming up after the easter hols teaching sculpture to 55 year 5 and 6 children so I needed to order some blocks which I did over the phone this morning. I then got a text from a guy introducing himself as 'the guy with the blocks' To start with he was asking me about if I could make a sculpture of his son....I said I could give it a go, but it probably wouldn't be recognisable as his son. I said I would charge £10 an hour and it would take about 6 hours. Then he said what's your name? and I said Hannah what's your name? and then he sent this ridiculous text:

"It's Richard luv so we're talking about 60 pound any chance of you throwin a dinner date in too han"

ewwww! I repleyed:

"I'm married so no. You've kind of made it weird now"

He hasn't texted back...phew. I'm not sure if he made the whole thing about him wanting a sculpture up now, but it's safe to say I won't be sculpting his son.

What I find amusing about this man is that as we only spoke on the phone, the only thing he knows about me is my name and the fact that I'm female. As you can't tell a lot by a name, his only real criteria is female. I was tempted to say "yes I'll go on a date with you" and then pay the ugliest actor I could find to go on a date and fart and pick her nose all the way through the meal.